Shrinking Sisters

I feel totally locked in

Driving home from the grocery store last night, I thought to myself “I am totally locked in.”

I was sipping on a bottle of Propel that I just purchased, and thinking about all the good decisions I made this weekend.

I took advantage of the fantastic weather and walked outside four times last week, logging nearly 12 miles. I did a little “functional fitness” Sunday afternoon and my husband and I washed our cars in the driveway, old-school with buckets and hoses.

Locked in.

Fridays are our night to dine out, and we went to Chipotle. I got the burrito bowl with chicken but unlike most weeks, I left off the guacamole because I had guacamole at lunch (those 100-calorie packs of Wholly Guacamole are staples in our house). I also left off the cheese and sour cream, but I usually do that.

Locked in.

I’ve been getting in my food and tracking before 9 p.m. and making a big mug of decaf green tea every night. I admit – I really want to eat, but that’s not my plan.

Locked in.

(Well, except last night when MS Word completely ATE the first draft of this blog post and I completely ATE a bag of Popcorners. Totally rage ate.)

But right back on the horse (and hitting “save”).

OK, here’s where this blog post gets complicated.

I had seen some online discussions of “healthy living” bloggers who were anything but healthy looking. They were shockingly thin, yet still restricting their eating and overexercising.

That’s when I thought to myself “If I could harness just a tiny fraction of their obsessive dedication …”

Is that wrong? Unhealthy? I’m conflicted.

I have a lifelong tendency to stray from my given plan, no matter how well I’m doing at the time. It’s just how I’m wired. I marvel at people’s sticktoitiveness.

But those driven, skinny women … how do they do it?

Don’t get me wrong – I don’t want to be skinny. Hell, my goal weight right now is 199, which is far from skinny, although on me it’s a size 12. Besides, I don’t believe it is genetically possible for this size 12 shoe-wearin’ Eastern European chick to be skinny.

Because as locked in as I am right now, it could unlock just as quickly. (See Popcorners demolition.)

I've gotta be honest -- I'm envious of their dedication, as misguided as it is.

After Friday’s weigh-in, I’m lower than I’ve been in months. I’m riding a wave of motivation, but there are gobs of seaweed heading toward me, threatening to knock me off my Surfboard of Success.

Learning how to stay on this surfboard while dodging the seaweed (or Popcorners, or what have you) is my biggest challenge.

So I dug out my Endorphin Warrior bracelet I bought last year and snapped it on. 

... because I am.

Monday is a terrible day to weigh!

So I'm changing my weigh-in day to Friday but I'll still report on it every Monday. I'm tired of being the "weekend bloat monster" and feeling like a high-school wrestler trying to "make weight" every Monday morning with a weekend full of safe but salty foods in my system.

And this weekend was particularly salty. We had Indian food Friday night, went out for an early Mother's Day dinner at an Italian restaurant Saturday night, and last night we invited everyone over for a hot-dog party. And while everything fit into my Weight Watchers Points allowance and I made some great choices (shrimp masala, grilled chicken cacciatore with no pasta, uncured turkey hot dogs), it was a salty, salty weekend.

Boo, salt!

Since I said I was going to report on the good, bad and ugly of the scale, it's up 2 pounds from last week but I know it's ALL sodium, based on the fact that my jeans still fit me exactly the same way.

That's why I'm moving the official weigh-ins to Friday. We only go out to dinner once a week but even though the food can be super healthy and within my calories/Points, it's still loaded with sodium. By weighing in on Friday mornings, any weekend salt fiestas will have the week to resolve themselves by Friday.

And since I'm being transparent and all, lemme share with you a piece of Photoshop nonsense from last week:

I was attempting to smooth out a shirt wrinkle that looked like a roll of fat so I fired up the ol' Photoshop liquify tool. Turns out, unless you're a retouching genius, Photoshopping a body against vertical stripes is a dead giveaway that you're messing with the photo, as you can tell by the closeup on the right.

Confession is good for the soul.

My 9 p.m. eating curfew has been going well, but there were a couple times I didn't finish my dinner and raced to down the leftovers at 8:59. No means no, lady!

As for the rest of my eating, my game plan this week is to eat even cleaner than I have before. This morning, for example, I sliced a cup of fresh strawberries and topped them with 6 ounces of plain nonfat Greek yogurt, a tablespoon each of honey and chopped walnuts. And it was fabulous. The only thing processed was the yogurt (sorry, I'm not making my own anytime soon). Real food mixed with other real food is simply great.

Onward and downward.

Clear eyes, full heart, can lose

How many times have I taken a breath and said “OK, let’s get back on track”? Lemme list the blog categories I created on this blog over the years:

• Doing Things Differently in 2010
• 2011, The Year of Getting it Done
• Pre-Baby Weight (which I hit for about 5 minutes)
• Project 150
• Project 2012
• Summer Spectacular

I’m really good at writing headlines, and labeling things and making logos – far easier than losing the weight.

I journeyed back to find any reference to how much I weighed back in 2010 and it’s exactly where I am now, but my muscle percentage has gone from around 32 percent to 37 percent, so some of the fluff has been displaced by muscle, and I am a size smaller.

Here is the issue I need to change:

• Eating random crap late at night

That’s it. One issue keeping the scale flat-lining, save for a jump up or down a few pounds.

That’s called maintenance, which is great if you’re done losing weight, but I’m not.

I’m working out 5 to 6 days a week, so it’s not lack of exercise, but as we all know, you can’t outrun your fork (or a handful of almonds, or a few spoons of ice cream, or a butterknife full of dark chocolate peanut butter).

I’m supposed to be recording everything that goes in my mouth after 9 p.m. and bringing that list to The Weight Shrink, but I’m not doing it. Those post 9 p.m. visits to the kitchen usually go like this:

1. Apple, handful of almonds (OK, great, stop there, you’re golden).
2. 3 ounces of turkey breast dipped in mustard.
3. Bowl of salad (Great, now shut it down).
4. Hummus and celery (or fingers)
5. Big swig of kefir
6. Cheese stick

So in one night, I can consume nearly a week’s worth of nighttime snacks.

No bueno.

And am I really, truly hungry? I sometimes think so, but really? No.

During the day, my meals are pretty much perfect – smoothie, protein bar and fruit, big salad with protein and a serving of healthy fats, lean proteins with green veggies and a single serving of starches.

But after dinner is when it all comes undone.

(Are you as tired of reading this as I am writing this?)

So, since I didn’t bother resolving anything on January 1, I’ll do it now (I was going to say “try it now” but like Yoda says:

“Do, or do not. There is no try.” (Funny thing is, I haven’t seen one Star Wars movie. Really.)

I resolve this day, Monday, April 29, 2013, that my will to succeed is far greater than my desire for a handful of pistachios, or a big glob of peanut butter, or a cheesestick, or leftover chicken, or whatever strikes my peckish fancy.

There.

Lessons learned, slate wiped clean. Hulk-smashing this plateau. (I actually broke the plateau a couple weeks ago to finally "win" a DietBet but it jumped back up a couple pounds about 5 minutes after I got off the scale.)

This time I mean it. And yes, I’ve written that before. How do I know this time?

Just a feeling – a strong, in-control, clear-eyed feeling that’s not wrapped up in frustration or futility.

Next week I will let you know the weight change from today, whatever the outcome.

I feel good about this. It can be done.

 

I yam what I yam: An ode to my 'muskles'

Yes, it has come to this.

Past couple of weeks, the scale hasn't moved so I decided to stay on the scale a little longer and see what was up.

Holy muskles, Popeye!

Last time I checked, my muscle percentage was around 33 percent. This morning it was right around 37 percent. 

So I decided to check my waist circumference and darned if it wasn't down 2 inches from January. 

Yet still ...

I want to see that main number go down on the scale. I have to; I weigh too much. 

And I'm perfectly happy setting my goal weight at 199.9 pounds. While that may sound like a lot, I've been that weight before and that's a size 12 to 14 for me. I'm a large-framed, huge-footed Eastern European chick who can put on some serious muscle. 

Waif is not in my vocabulary. Or my genetics.

I need to set a hotter fire in my metabolism. Most of the time I walk around with freezing feet. My body temperature is actually lower than 98.6.

So I'm reading a book I got a couple years ago on the "metabolic effect." (It's called "The New ME Diet.") It focuses on fat loss while preserving muscle, and that is exactly what I need. I haven't read too much of the book yet so I can't really speak to what the the eating plan involves, but it mentions protein and fiber frequently. 

It also focuses on interval training, which increases the body's EPOC -- excess post-exercise oxygen consumption -- or the "afterburn."

And this all still fits in with me following Weight Watchers -- I absolutely have to journal my foods so meals don't get away from me. Something I've discovered since Weight Watchers changed from Points to PointsPlus is you get more bang for your buck from foods like lean proteins and produce (obviously -- fruits and non-starchy vegetables are 0 Points). Calories don't even fit into the equation for calculating Points -- it's protein, fiber, fat and carbs. 

It's kinda (OK, really) annoying feeling that you're at war with the scale but that's where my head is right now. But the muscle gain and waist shrinkage has tempered the annoyance somewhat.

Onward and downward. 

Disclosure: Weight Watchers is providing me three months' online membership, but really, I've been an online member for the past few months, so bonus!

Motivation Monday: Be transparent, not translucent

I’ve been spinning my wheels and felt the need to get things moving.

So I stopped lying.

“How many workouts did you get in last week?” the Weight Shrink would ask.

“Oh, every day!” I would fib.

“How’s the eating going?”

“Great! Doing everything right!” I would fib.

But was I?

No, not really.

Every day was really 4 or 5 days a week. “Doing everything great!” didn’t mention an ongoing love affair with a bottle of mango jam that I was putting in and on everything.

Small things, really, but for me enough to make the scale stay put.

Today I changed all that.

Everything is real. Everything gets entered, logged and tracked.

They’re only numbers – Points, pounds, minutes – but if I do them truthfully I’ll bet I can make the magic happen.

I had been translucent – vague, fuzzy, somewhat clear. But now I’m making it all crystal clear in high definition.

And that includes weighing every morning on my Withings scale -- the one I call the "concrete scale" because the number gets uploaded via WiFi to my chart. I had been only weighing in once a week on it and only after I liked the number on the regular scale.

Yeesh -- I know!

And today, because I stopped BS-ing around, I feel like I’ve made huge progress

Disclosure: Weight Watchers is providing me a three-month online membership, but really, I've been an online member for the past few months anyway, so bonus!

Motivation Monday: Let’s crunch the numbers

(Let's get back to motivating on Monday, mmmkay?)

The weight stayed the same on the scale this week (I call the Withings scale my “concrete scale” because when you step on it, the number uploads to the Internet, no goofing allowed) but that’s not the whole story.

My body fat percentage is going down, so the “fluff” is muscling up – all in all a good thing.

And I’ve been racking up more hours sleeping – no more late-night TV watching and Facebook noodling. It’s more important to sleep than to surf. My Fitbit keeps track of those zzzz's as does my Withings phone app.

The other great number – my blood pressure.

I don’t have a problem with blood pressure but it has a tendency to get kinda borderline when I don’t work out enough.

Since I instituted my “Zumba Every Day” game plan last week, I got in six workouts the past week. This week I’m helping my goal by scheduling it for 11 a.m. every day. It’s the best time of day for me – breakfast has been in me a couple of hours, it’s before noon, the coffee has kicked in and my energy and motivation are still high.

I didn't even hit the 'clear' button.

So, the blood pressure. I took a picture of it yesterday at the grocery store:

Ultimately, that’s more important than any number on a scale.

But those other numbers have me motivated to do better this week with working out and meal planning so perhaps The Mother of All Plateaus will break soon.

I am my own weight-loss guru

Funny thing happened on the way to today's blog post. Last week I thought I'd be telling you about the miraculous amount of weight I lost following a new book's plan that promised a pound lost a day. I was psyched and bought all the groceries and printed out the high-intensity workout plan.

Three days in, I found that I had gained 2 pounds.

Five days in, not wanting to make things worse, I went back to my own plan -- the plan that allowed me to lose three pounds the week before.

Why do we I keep falling for the latest, greatest books/supplements/foods/DVDs/etc., when the best expert is right under our noses (or is our noses)?

In the run-up to starting the plan, I was excited yet calm in the notion that my days would be planned out for me. Turns out, that calm I felt helped me NOT do those self-sabotaging things that get me in trouble (hello, nighttime eating!).

But I've already been doing that. At the start of the year (and I keep writing about it) I got a copy of the book The Simple Diet and I jumped head-first into the plan that keeps things really simple -- shakes, bars, frozen entrees and 5 servings of produce a day. The only tweak I made was to sub out a home-cooked dinner, within the plan's calorie and protein parameters.

So I'm back on my own plan -- the plan that was working before I went on the plan that backfired. And the fretting over the weight gain is replaced by the renewed calm in knowing that I AM MY OWN WEIGHT-LOSS GURU. (Ommmmmm...)

But I did pull some ideas from the other plan:

• Oatmeal is a really filling breakfast -- even a measly package of instant.
• An apple and a small handful of almonds makes a great snack and it's totally portable.
• If you split up your water 16 ounces at a time for every meal and snack, you'll get through 10 glasses in no time.
• The lunch was great and it gave me a whole new appreciation for sprouts, which I hadn't bought in ages. (I bought the spicy sprouts.) It consists of a couple pieces of Ezekiel bread, which I spread with a 100-calorie pack of Wholly Guacamole. Then I put on a big pile of sprouts, some baby spinach and a big slice of tomato with a sprinkle of True Lime granulated lime juice.

Lesson learned: I need to stop getting in the way of myself. (Haven't I said that before?)

Motivation Monday: Me? A dream board?

Yes, folks, take in all its delicious glory:

I was prompted to do this after my SparkPeople Live meeting on Friday. SparkPeople now offers live meetings with leaders and members (just like that other weight-loss company) but you do it at home with a headset and a webcam. Anyway, one of the projects was to create a dream board.

I've seen some pretty "woo woo" dream boards -- ones where people write themselves blank checks for a million dollars, stuff like that. But I made one anyway, and what I noticed was that my images were almost all fitness related.

I did put one picture of "skinny jeans" on, but those actually come from Lane Bryant. Seriously, how "skinny" does a butt have to be?) My other dream is to be able to buy afford clothes at Lululemon. Biggest size in the Ta Ta Tamer doesn't really count.

There's a big "50" at the center of the board for many reasons:

• I turn 50 in March
• I am going to lose 50 pounds this year
• 150 is my ultimate goal

I also have reminders to drink more water, get more sleep, journal ALL my eating and close the kitchen at 9 p.m. 

Can't believe I, the cynic, made a dream board but it was an inspiring activity.

And for more inspiration, here's the latest HealthBuzz:

Motivation Monday: Tony-Tony-Tony has done it again

I was planning on working today but first I was slogging through my emails, watching the Today show and checking Facebook.

Then I read this:

I did not lose weight by feeling sorry for myself.....

I lost weight by feeling exhausted after a workout.
I lost weight by feeling out of place by saying no to foods others could eat.
I lost weight by feeling relieved that I could buy clothes at normal stores.
I lost weight by feeling I could.

Everyone loses weight differently. The beauty is.... I am no different.

Is that fantastic, or what? It was a wall posting from Tony Posnanski, aka The Anti-Jared, a blogger who lost over 200 pounds and writes from the heart and from the gut. His Facebook posts and blog posts are a kick in the butt to me. They remind me that I have to stop being such a freakin' baby (me, at left) about making sacrifices to lose weight.

Yes, you have to sacrifice some things. You can't baby yourself, and when I get all "wah, wah I don't wanna" about things, Tony's there to knock some sense into me.

He can be brutal and blunt but also inspiring and funny and very, very helpful. Go read his blog, fan him on Facebook and follow him on Twitter.

So after I read his Facebook post, I ran out the door and kept running for 6 miles. It was hot and sunny and I was dousing myself with my water bottle, but I did it, and I felt great when I finished. And I'll keep doing it.

Because I can.

Motivation Monday: Lessons learned

I'm back down to pre-baby weight again this week, thanks in part to the tweak I put into place last Monday -- instead of flying by the seat of my pants, foodwise, I'm planning the day ahead of time. Worked like a charm.

But that's not the only rule I put into this past week, so let's recap what worked for me and could work for you:

Write it before you bite it: Plan your day before you start peeking into the pantry. You won't be surprised at the end of the day and find yourself eating celery and egg whites for dinner. The one day when I didn't plan my meals, I wound up eating a weird and unsatisfying mishmash of cereal and milk and soup (not all together -- it was random kitchen wandering).

Don't go overboard: I'm doing Weight Watchers Online and I have found that when I only use no more than half those weekly bonus Points I lose weight. When I used 'em all, I either didn't lose weight or gained.

Don't sweat the small stuff: I gave myself permission to use as many Crystal Light Pure packets as I wanted. At first, I'd count those 30 calories and not use more than one a day. But then I'd do something silly like grab for a box of cereal, and in the long run that 30 calories of water flavoring was a lot fewer than the handfuls of cereal. So I decided to drink them with abandon. But really, it never came to more than two a day. And when I drank two that meant I was getting in 8 glasses of water a day because I used a quart of water with the packet -- not the 16 ounces that the box recommends.

Stay true to yourself: I've been sticking with the no-wheat pledge and have been finding it really easy to follow. It started out as an experiment after reading the book Wheat Belly (can I really do that?) but I soon realized that my volatile tummy is quiet and happy without it. By putting the focus on health instead of "dieting" I let my husband and son polish off the bread at dinner Friday night while I happily ate my crouton-free salad.

Every damn day: I've had a cold since last Tuesday but it hasn't been enough to send me into bed all day. As soon as the gunk cleared, I laced up the sneakers and headed out for a walk. No, I didn't set any land speed records and there may or may not have been a snot rocket launched (more about that HERE), but the weather has cooled off and there was no way I was going to stay indoors. And I think the exercise may have done more for me than the Sudafed. I saw a woman in the grocery store wearing the shirt at left, and I hunted one down on eBay to celebrate my weight loss this week.

All simple, all effective. Think I'll "just do it" again this week!